There will come a time, you’ll see, with no more tears and love won’t break your heart.

Hey.

Gosh. This week has been, interesting. It has involved:

- Starting a fight with a pensioner over a parking spot. In my defense, he was a fucking cock. And he started a fight with my Auntie, who is elderly in her own right. Is 65 elderly? Well, she is my Aunt, so that was reason enough. The fucking bastard scurried away though while I was searching the floor for a rock to deck him with, or at least scratch “You a sodding knob!” in to his car. Or forehead.

- Fainting in the blood room at the hospital. Seriously though, why does the blood insist on poring out soooo fast! It just shoots out doesn’t it? No wonder Aids is so catching. People who have got it probably were just standing near somebody and the blood just exploded out of their veins all over the surrounding public. Much like when you see a water balloon explode in slow motion? Yeah? Because I have no trouble believing this after seeing the pressure of that fucker!

- I got a new vintage book. And oh my god, I can’t put it down. It’s a little strange, to say the least. I showed it to my friend, Cat, with the intention of her seeing its beauty. But no. She just went though it, choosing perfectly innocent, none *cough* erotic scenes and made them sexy. She is very good at it mind. And to be fair, some of it is a little let’s say, semi erotic. God, not erotic. NOT EROTIC. Just, there is a lot of discussion about riding atop their muscular steeds and breeding with each other! Awful as it sounds, it doesn’t in the story. I assure you.

SPEEKING of Cat and muscular steeds, despite what she would have you believe on Face book, she showed me a delightful website about, wait for it, or hold your horses as it were… haha, Centaur porn.

Yes.

It was, well, I can’t say it wasn’t shocking. Because it was fucking shocking, I just don’t understand it. Especially when some of these Centaurs had like 6 legs and 4 penises. I even saw one that had like human hands for feet, and his story implied that it wasn’t a happy accident, that he had purposely done it! Just, whyyyyy? Not even that, but HOWW? What the fuck is he gonna do with that?? He can’t hold anything, I might have understood a little more if he had feet put where his hands were, and then, the feet that are going to be thrown away, he would take the thumbs or like two fingers and graft them on to his feet hands. THAT I could understand, but this, this was just absurd!!

And really, who finds this sexy? Not I. And I can imagine, not 99.99% of the population. But there will be that few. There has to be that few! There were submitted stories for fucks sake!! I have had a think about this, well, it was hard not to, the images are engraved on to my mind forever! But, I have decided, it MUST be like the people who are like, obsessed with things like Dungeons and Dragons, Larping and such because if you are around mythical creatures all day, and people you hang out with dress up as them, surely you must develop some sort of attraction.

But still. That is no excuse to Photoshop a young boys face and cock on too a Dolphin gracefully jumping out of the ocean. That is one step away from bestiality. Actually, is it bestiality? I am going to go with yes it is! And you would have to do it in water, but not in water… you know, so it’s awkward and inappropriate bestiality at that. God.

And on that note, here is week two of Ren Does This Booking shit. In two parts. Fuck yeahhhh.

Part 1:

Part 2: